Unpublished Screenplay ~~- THE GROSS FAMILY


Access to current version restricted.
2251 Characters =~2.3Min. Reading Time
The Grosses are nice people.
They don't hurt anyone.
But not one of them has a filter.

The Doctor explains: "They were born without the gene that builds the part of the brain that creates modesty, propriety, etiquette, impulse resistance.
Where other people would self-censor, they openly belch, pass gas, blurt out whatever thought enters their minds.
In some people, this can be very dangerous.
If they get a violent urge, they lack the power to resist it; they sometimes kill on a whim.
So it's very important that people with this condition avoid conflict both in life and in their entertainment."

Bocephus "Booger" Gross, 18, the oldest son of Flomingus Gross, walks with a girl who he met at high school through the park.
While she is looking at a bird in a tree, he digs a finger deep into his nose, then puts his arm around her and tickles her bare shoulder with the finger, then puts his hand in her hair and plays with her hair.
She smiles, "What a nice touch you have".

Flatus "Fart" Gross, the 13 year old son, lays on the floor of the family room watching Baywatch on the big-screen tv.
His hand is down his pants.
His mother walks past and says, "Hey, Fart, you want some lemonade?"
"Sure, Mom, thanks", he says.
She hands him the drink, and he drinks it dry, then lets out a giant belch and returns his hand into his pants and resumes watching Baywatch.

Chlamydia Gross, "Clymie" for short, walks down the school hallway in her squeaking leather miniskirt.
Girls taunt her singing, "Nanny nanny wee wee, Your name means Vee Dee-ee."

Mayor Heitzler sits at his desk at home, apparently working hard.
But on his computer screen is hardcore porno no one should see, and from the redness of his face and the gyration of his shoulder he appears to be vigorously whacking himself.
His wife/assistant walks in the door.
He hits the f7 key on his keyboard and the porno whisks away and is replaced by government files.
She says, "Dear, you're all red and sweaty."
He says, "Yes, this is very hard work."
She closes the door, leaving.
He stretches his hands awkwardly to hit the alt-shift-f1-period key combination, and the porno whisks back onto the screen.